An astrology birth chart is a map of where the planets were aligned the day you were born, right down to the minute.
It’s believed that these paths reveal your strengths, weaknesses and act as an overall guide to your personality.
Behold, my character flaws personality traits, as told by moments in pop culture that make me laugh.
CW: Raquel Chisholm / AD: Anna Cevallos
Sun in Libra
This is the one that is most popularly recognized. It’s the butt of all jokes like, “You’re sucha cancer, Cheryl!” Having my sun in Libra means I love fairness, making me a great team player. After all, our symbol is the scales. But in my eternal search for harmony, I won’t think in absolutes: this is great, but let’s make it even better.
Moon in Capricorn
An unorganized Capricorn? Never heard of her! Think of moon signs like the poster-child of your emotions. Mine keeps me cool-headed, organized, efficient and particularly selective.
Ascendant in Scorpio
People like to describe your rising sign as your mask because it represents the way people see you. Mine wants to command respect and carry a lot of presence with intensity and tenacity.
Mercury in Scorpio
This dictates how I think, feel, and write. Having Mercury in Scorpio, I’m always looking for the real meaning behind something. It makes for being extremely observant, passionate with my words and excellent in strategizing.
Venus in Libra
Just can’t stand imbalance! Shan’t have it! Libras try to impress with our kindness, evenhandedness, and ardent willingness to make things work. So I’m loving that for me just as much as I love that for you.
Mars in Scorpio
Oh you thought this was a game? What else am I suppose to do with all this concentrated energy?? Throw me a challenge because my Mars in Scorpio constantly craves the personal satisfaction of mastering it.
I once had a recruiter tell me that water came out of their nose because I made them laugh too hard so riddle me that.
Jupiter in Libra
Seeing that Jupiter is our largest planet it only makes sense that this sign packs all the knowledge.
For me this means I just want to absorb it allllll in and pick it apart. Facts and notes and stories, the boring, the thrilling— it’s all an absolute delight to me. Oh, Ben Franklin was in a secret sex cult? Tell me more. Toto is made up of a group of session musicians? Consider my interest, piqued. Allicin? You better sit down, bud.
Every opportunity to learn is another possible avenue for success.
Saturn in Aquarius
But with all this appetite for knowledge my big beautiful brain is at a risk! I gotta know when to reel it in. That’s why I often look to people for advice and surround myself with responsible folks who will keep me grounded and checked-in.
Uranus in Capricorn
Her mission? Question tradition and redefine success. How? We’re figuring it out.
But unwavering ambition and a serious mind will get me there! Don’t you love to see a rebel with a well thought out, rational cause that plays to their responsibility and tact???
Neptune in Capricorn
Discerning, wise, sensible.
The taste is just impeccable.
True to the dutiful Caps in my life, I’m just trying to be like them and better myself by discovering inspiration through a balance of hard work and imagination.
Pluto in Scorpio
Pluto is a funny one because it only stays in a sign for 30 years before it changes. Pluto rules power, intensity, and obsession. My current cycle is passionate, intense and obsessive. Whattaya gonna do when you wear your heart on your sleeve (and the Internet)!
Eventually I’ll transform from outdated expectations and fears, and grow into something new and all the wiser.
But for now, I am very sensitive please don’t yell at me.